Room Service in CHINA

I could not resist posting this!!  I need it to refer back to and have a GOOD LAUGH.  This has been MY LIVE over the last 18 months.  ENJOY!

This story was widely circulated by email around 2001-2, within which it was alleged to be the genuine transcript of a telephone conversation between a guest and room-service in a hotel in Asia in the late 1990's, and it supposedly appeared in an item published in the Far East Economic Review. This is all false however:

Room Service is in fact a chapter from US comedian Shelley Berman's book 'A Hotel Is A Funny Place'. In truth the incident portrayed never happened in any hotel, in Asia or otherwise. Shelley Berman wrote 'Room Service' as a piece of fictional humour. Shelley Berman has kindly allowed this extract to appear on this site, and this permission is gratefully acknowledged.

As well as being one of the best loved and funniest comedians and writers of his generation, Shelly Berman is also a lecturer at the University of Southern California. More information at: Shelley Berman.

The Room Service fictional exchange is a wonderful and amusing example of how and why the effective understanding relies not only on language and communication, but also on the abilities of the communicators to interpret meaning.

excerpt from "A Hotel is a Funny Place ..."

N.B. This material is a chapter from Shelley Berman's copyrighted book. It is reproduced here with permission. Reading hints: You are on the phone. The other party is also in the hotel:

Morny, rune sore-bees.

Oh sorry, I thought I dialed room service.

Rye. Rune sore-bees. Morny. Jewish to odor sunteen?

Yes, order something. This is room thirteen-on-five. I want…

Okay, torino-fie. Yes plea?

I'd like some bacon and eggs.

Ow July then?

What?

Aches.

Ow July then? Pry, boy, pooch…?

Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry. Scrambled, please.

Ow July thee baycome? Crease?

Crisp will be fine.

Okay. An Santos?

What?

Santos. July Santos?

Uh…I don't know…I don't think so.

No? Judo one toes?

Look. I really feel bad about this, but I just don't know what judo-one-toes means. I'm sorry…

Toes! Toes! Why Jew Don Juan toes? Ow bow eenlish mopping we bother?

English muffin! I've got it! You were saying toast! Fine. An English muffin will be fine. We bother? No. Just put the bother on the side.

Wad?

I'm sorry. I meant butter. Butter on the side.

Copy?

I feel terrible about this but… Copy.

Copy, tea, mill…

Coffee!! Yes, coffee please. And that's all.

One Minnie. Ass rune torino-fie, strangle-aches, crease baycome, tossy eenlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy. Rye?

Whatever you say. Okay.

Tenjewberrymud.

You're welcome.